Looking back at my so-called love life, leaves me with the feeling you get when you eat food that you have been eagerly anticipating, but tasted and brought you to anti-climax — It kind of sucked!
I committed and looked forward to the future — a bit too eagerly, in hindsight. Since I couldn’t eat my cake and have it, I sacrificed the adventurer in me that wanted to explore, know people, have conversations and just chill for commitment and stability…at that time, it felt like the right thing to do. The expected way to behave.
Now, together with Loni Love and other great minds (wink), I’m one of the ‘staunch advocators’ for making the most out of your 20’s, while consciously making right decisions…
The essence of this I believe, is to learn about yourself, see yourself through the lens of others— while being conscious to learn the great lessons contained therein, and not lose yourself to the illusion of the perfect you by someone else, know your love language, connect with different people from all across life’s great diversity; emerging from your youthful years as a collage of bigger and better you, your formative years spent networking and learning about number 1, YOURSELF. In fact, I think it’s a plan for self care.
Dating can be good vibes without sexual involvement. Multi-dating is not ‘Multi-doing it!’
Hol’ up. I hear the naysayers sneering at that last line, and questioning how many relationships today can truly survive without a bit of _quid pro quo_. You’re probably right, you’re probably not, but that’s a topic for a different discussion. Right now, just hear me out…
First off, you have to understand that you don’t have to know the end from the beginning. Be cautiously open to it, and enjoy it while it lasts!
Be true to yourself and the people you choose to date. Spice it up! Don’t let it be monotonous and one-directional. Take each other out for some stimulating, cerebral conversations, build connections, form your ideals. Have fun!
There is a caveat here in choosing whom you date eventually. The art of multi dating is a carefully balanced act, that if done poorly, threatens to leave the parties involved with more heartbreak than a fellow whose winning betslip fell into a vat of hot tar. As always, a proper amount of caution should be exercised in getting the best out of this.
You should know that I’m rooting this unsolicited opinion mostly on how I feel and since our emotions are fickle which may or may not nudge us in the path of beneficial change, I hope you read this knowing it’s not gospel truth. If you didn’t, maybe you should read it again, this time with a lil’ bias.
Peace and Clarity Always!